When Did It Happen?

I was 22 when I started this journey.  I am now 23 and I'm thinking wow.  My biggest goal last year at this time was to live up my last year of college.  My biggest goal this year: making sure my students learn something, making sure my students grow on their end of the year test, making sure my students get the most out of their learning, making sure my students graduate, making sure my students are on the right track to high school, and making sure I'm doing my best to get them there.  

I know you've probably heard this before but I'm not only a teacher.  I'm a mentor, role model, advisor, parent, disciplinarian, counselor, party planner, delegate, and basically everything that a child/administrator needs me to be.  I don't think people realize how true this is.  It's cute to hear but actually living it is tough and so there is no room left for you.  I just came out of an ILT (Instructional Leadership Team) meeting last week where we were making decisions about next year.  I mean I didn't even think a first year teacher could be a part of the ILT.  What experiences do I to even be a part of a leadership team?  But there I was making decisions.  I didn't even know what we where talking about half the time but I was trying and that's another part of growing up. Getting yourself thrown into something that makes no sense to you and hoping for the best.  

It's only been a year and my priorities no longer focus on me and that's the hardest part about growing up. I'm not the center of my life anymore.  I have 85 little bodies that now make up this center.  Everything revolves around them.  I now completely understand new parents and how they're ALWAYS talking about their kids and what they're doing and showing you pictures ALL the time.  I totally get it and I'm sorry for ever hating you.  I look around at my friends and their "important moving up the ladder" lives and I can't help but think when did it happen?  

When did we all grow up so fast? 

-Ms. P

#Proud

When I'm proud of my kids I want to share it with the world!  This is a graduation speech that one of my 8th graders wrote.  I don't get a lot of genuinely good writing and so this just truly made my day and gave hope that you know what there is hope out there somewhere.  

Enjoy:

A great man once said, “Here's to the crazy ones, the misfits, the rebels, the troublemakers, the round pegs in the square holes... the ones who see things differently -- they're not fond of rules... You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them, but the only thing you can't do is ignore them because they change things... they push the human race forward, and while some may see them as the crazy ones, we see genius, because the ones who are crazy enough to think that they can change the world, are the ones who do.”

Families, Friends, Teachers and Staff, before you up on this stage are a group of  hilarious people who I couldn’t hate no matter how hard I tried. Geniuses who question my intelligence everyday and I wouldn’t be surprised if they came up to me after this to correct whatever mistakes I might’ve made! On this stage is a group of free, confused and lonely scholars who are indeed crazy, but will definitely change the world one day.

This year was not at all what any of us were expecting, but luckily we survived. We made it and now we’re up on this stage and we have the honor to stand before you all and make you proud. Those smiles on your faces are because of us and nothing warms our hearts more than all of your smiles. Nothing is better than this feeling we all have right now! I had so many doubts this year and I was so sure that I wouldn’t be where I am right now, but I am. And you know what I don’t even care anymore. I don’t care about yesterday’s pain or how I’m going to wake up tomorrow morning and think about right now. I don’t care about any of that. At least not right now. Everything is so complete in this moment and I don’t need anything to rain on my parade. They say that nothing beautiful is perfect, but I cannot think of a more beautifully perfected moment than right now. 

And I know that there are people who say that all dreams don’t come true, and there are people who forget what it’s like to be 13 when they turn 14. And though these will all be stories someday, and our pictures will be old photographs, and we’ll become somebody’s parents one day. But right now, these moments are not stories. This is happening. I am here and I am looking at my wonderful classmates, and I am so proud of them right now. I can see it. This one moment when you know you’re not a sad story. You are alive. And you stand up and see the lights on the buildings and everything that makes you wonder. And you’re listening to that song on that drive and you’re sitting on the stage, with the people you love most in this world. And in that moment. I swear we are infinite

I give to you the Class of 2014!

-Ms. P

I Don't Care

You're failing this class.  "I don't care."
I'm calling home tonight.  "I don't care."
You need to get back here before you get in trouble.  "I don't care."
You didn't do your homework It's going down as a zero.  "I don't care."
I don't care. I don't care. I don't care. I don't care.

I have been having such a difficult time with my 7th graders that I just had to dedicate a post just to those 26 lovely bunch of I want to tear my head of when I see you individuals.  I would rather deal with both 6th and 8th grade in one room than deal with this class.  Now that's saying something.

A lot of my students use the phrase "I don't care" but these 7th graders just take it to another level.

I mean lets be real here.  If I make your parent come down to school right this minute, those tears will be coming down faster than you can say "I don't care" one more time!  So I know there's a small little spark of "I do care" somewhere in there.  How do I get it out?!

That's the hard part.  I will be honest here.  My 7th graders are going to have one tough time getting into a good high school next year because of their grades and most importantly because of this "I don't care" attitude.  I have done everything possible.  Called their parents, made their parents come to school, had their parents follow their child for a few hours at school, and everything in between.  I have literally showed them the requirements of the top high schools in the city and we've sat down figuring out which ones they are able to get into (which are slim to none).  But nothing.  There is no change. There is no motivation to do better.  Nothing.  In fact they actually started laughing and calling each other out.  "Haha you stupid..you ain't gettin anywhere!."  Really?

My 7th graders took a test on the elements and the periodic table about  two weeks ago.  The class average was a 48.2%.  48.2!!!  EVERY single one of them failed.  Miserably.  And to make things worse I gave them a study guide that was WORD FOR WORD the test.  I mean it couldn't have been easier for them.  So what happened?  They didn't study because they didn't care.  It's that simple. As a teacher the worst thing that can probably happen to you is having a group of students who just don't care about their education.

It's the worst feeling in the world and it's happening to me and I don't know what to do about it.

-Ms. P

Celebrations

What?  I'm celebrating?  

Yes!  It's going to be a very short term celebration but a celebration nonetheless.  Last week we received some data back from our testing back in December.  The data showed our student growth from end of the last school year to December of this school year.  Glad to say my 6th grade ELA students grew 96%.  We were the second class behind 8th grade (who grew 99%) in the school to have a  growth above 40%.  I am extremely proud of my students.  I shared the document with them and they too were amazed.  As a first year teacher I just let out a huge sigh of relief.  I'm ACTUALLY teaching kids and they're ACTUALLY learning something! I still can't believe it.  We obviously have a lot of work ahead of us to keep up that 96% and especially if my students think they can raise it to a 99% by the end of the year and so like I said short term celebration.  

-Ms. P